MOVIE REVIEW: LET'S BE COPS (2015)

Let's Be Cops is a 2015 comedy movie that provides a bit of a shake up to the old buddy cop formula. Featuring a white guy and a black guy who are approaching mid-life and are quite disappointed in life, they each experience what it is like to be respected in the community. And once this happens, there is no turning back for them.

The big downside for this movie is that it just isn't very memorable. I can't really recall the names of the characters. One of the characters is a video game designer and the other character a washed-up former highschool football star. After the games designer gets his latest game shot down, they take some leftover police costumes to a costume party.

What follows next is semi-predictable. They like the response they get and the respect when they are walking home in uniform. They then decide to do it more often. Originally it goes well until they get over there heads. What follows is that true cops show that they are the real heroes they are while the main characters help out and find their self worth.

Being predictable isn't bad, however. This movie keeps up the constant laughs without any sudden tonal shifts. The main characters never turn into action heroes and the situational comedy is constant. Every time they get in over there heads, you wait to see it blow up in there faces. Although at the end it takes some liberties for the happy ending, it makes sense in the context of the movie.

Overall, Let's Be Cops is a surprising movie. It was constantly entertaining with a clear story that never tried to be something that it is not. It also earned its happy ending (for the most part).

4 out of 5  Legal Waffles.

MOVIE REVIEW: FAST AND FURIOUS 7

Fast and Furious 7 is kind-of just there as a movie. Fully embracing it's ridiculousness, this movie feels the worse for it. It definitely feels like a step backwards from Fast and Furious 6 because it is missing the earnestly that number 6 approached it's subject matter with.

Fast and Furious 7 features the return of the all-mighty Vin Diesel and is Paul Walkers final Fast and Furious movie (due to tragic circumstances). It goes on to show that some car drag-racers are really the best people for the job of high-level spywork and security operations for some unknown reason. This time they are being hunted by Jason Statham in revenge for them crippling his brother. The Rock is also in there but it feels like an afterthought.

There really isn't too much to say about this movie. It has removed all pretence of restraint to show cars jumping out of planes and between buildings (as shown in the trailers). And it feels the worse for it. The whole movie is that Vin's crew are glorified and are more than a match for a team of international arms dealers and a globally-feared assassin because of their street-smarts.

Fast and Furious 7 falls down because of this. The action scenes may sound impressive but they fall flat as there is no emotional investment in anything. They keep trying to outdo themselves to diminishing effect and the earnestness it used to have is gone. Fast and Furious 6 was surprisingly good as it struck a good balance. Fast and Furious 7 feels competent and nothing more or less.

2.5 out of 5 Drag-Racing Waffles.

MOVIE REVIEW: RAID 2 BERANDAL (2014)

The sequel to the awesome Raid movie, the question was how do you top the original movie. Similar to Dredd, the Raid was about a bunch of police officers who went to raid a crimelords building. Of course, the crime lord found out they were coming and subsequently slaughtered most of them.

The original Raid movie was awesome because of the tight action sequences set in densely packed corridors. It felt like an action game brought to life well, which is no small compliment to the movie. And it managed to do this with a minimalist storyline. Minimalist doesn’t mean bad, however, as the storyline, like the action movie, was a tightly woven story of betrayal and justice as a rookie cop finally succeeds in his mission.

The Raid 2 begins where the Raid leaves off, with the main character, Rama, being recruited to go undercover to root out more crooked cops. Starting off in a prison, we are once again treated to some slick action sequences before the movie turns into a suspenseful crime drama of betrayal and corruption. This story is surprisingly engaging, and it still works on a minimalistic style. There isn’t a wasted detail or scene.

And then there is the finale. The set-up all leads to a showdown as a one-man army of Rama goes through a bunch of gangsters. Every action sequence is unique and brings something new to the table, from introducing cool new characters (such as hammer-girl) or, my favourite, when Rama is escaping from a car.

In short, The Raid 2 lives up and even surpasses the original in several areas. It runs at 150 minutes, but it feels like every line and scene achieved a point. The storyline was more involved without ever feeling bloated, and the action sequences were just as good, or even better than the original as they had allot more freedom in terms of locations and props.

5 out of 5 machete cut waffles.

MOVIE REVIEW: HERCULES (2014)

Hercules is the latest movie starring Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. Based on the legend of Hercules, Son of Zeus, it feels like there was a much more interesting movie hidden away in the story of this movie. Unfortunately, Hercules feels like it is rushed, with several big reveals coming across as formulaic rather than shocking.

The big hook of this movie is that Hercules and his 12 labours are all propaganda for a bunch of mercenaries that Hercules leads. Hercules was once part of the Athenian army and all the labours he accomplished were actually hoaxes (or the like). Hercules than uses his reputation that he gained from these deeds to help him get work until he retires. Added to this is that everyone believes he murdered his family in a “battle-rage”.

And so then we are onto his last job, where he will earn his last amount of gold before he retires to the beach. Of course, things go wrong, he ends up being double-crossed, and he has to prove he is really the legend that the myths make him out to be. Add in a rushed reveal proving his innocence in killing his family, and the movie feels like it has just been going through the motions.

Hercules is a decent action movie. However, I feel like there was a more interesting movie in how Hercules built up the myth of himself. Instead, the movie seems to be trying to be as generic as possible. The twist, the proving of innocence and the big heroic moments all feel like they are being acted off Action-Script 101. It doesn’t do anything special, and all the cool parts in the trailer (Hercules fighting the Hydra and the Boar) are fully shown in the trailer.

At the end of the day, Hercules is a competent action movie. The more fantastical elements or interesting parts of the movie are left by the wayside to produce a generic movie. Hercules could have been so much more special than it was if it was a little less grounded in realism.

2 out of 5 demi-god Waffles.

MOVIE REVIEW: JUPITER ASCENDING (2015)

Jupiter Ascending came after a last minute delay to its release schedule. Starring Channing Tatum and Mila Kunis, this movie is a mixture of space-opera and sci-fi. It has the general story about a chosen one just living a pretty underwhelming life in a world full of wonders.

Mila Kunis stars as the titular Jupiter, a Russian immigrant cleaner. However, she is also the exact genetic reproduction (and this believed to be reincarnation) of the former queen of the universe. He (former) children are each trying to find her so that they can trick her to signing away her inheritance. Channing Tatum is a wolf-soldier tasked with tracking her down. However, once he realises he was tricked, he turns into her superhuman protector and general bad-ass.

And that really is the meat of the story. Jupiter is kidnapped a few times, shows increasing agency in not throwing her inheritance away (which would mean the death of the earth as it is harvested for genetic material), and having Channing Tatum do cool stuff with his futuristic technology (such as rocket boots and temporary doorways) to save her. Which isn’t to say it is all bad.

Jupiter Ascending does an admirable job of keeping the movie pace up and not being caught up to much in world-building. It would have been easy for the movie to get stuck on some part of the lore it is building up. However, a couple of action scenes do overstay their welcome and seem to drag out a bit just to show some cool set-piece instead of letting it develop organically.

Overall there is not much to say about this movie. The lore they build up behind the worlds is quite good, the action scenes are also quite good and the character development of Mila Kunis and Channing Tatum is also good. It was entertaining for its 2+ hour run-time, but not too much stuck with me following the end credits. In the past, it is the very definition of an average movie. Today, however, it is a refreshing movie that is not a sequel/reboot/remake and not a superhero movie.

3.5 out of 5 wolf-spliced waffles.

MOVIE REVIEW: MAZE RUNNER (2014)

Sometimes, you wish that a movie was just made as a stand-alone movie. That is what hamstrings Maze Runner the most. Just when it seems like it has established its world and starts setting up the main story, it suddenly ends. Just when it starts to get really good, they try to leave it open for a sequel which undermines its main story.

Maze Runner is about a group of boys trapped in the centre of a moveable maze, who have had there memories wiped. In the maze, techno-organic reavers roam hunting any kids left there at night. When our main character arrives, Tomas, things begin to change. The reavers start attacking in daylight, the maze doesn’t shut the gate at night to protect the boys and a girl arrives. What follows is part lord-of-the-flies, as the boys fight for trying to escape vs staying put, and then the attempt to find an exit.

It feels like there are several different, interconnected movies stuck together in Maze Runner. There is the lord-of-the-flies type infighting amongst the boys. Add to this the mystery of the maze and the attempts to escape the maze. Both of these movies mesh together quite well. However, towards the end of the movie, it tries to throw in a big twist which doesn’t provide a satisfying conclusion. It tries to set-up a sequel and leave unanswered questions, but instead it feels like it is only sequel-bait as it tries to set-up a franchise.

I have to mention I really liked the design of the maze and the reavers. The maze looks like an imposing structure of metal and stone, having that low-tech feel to it. The reavers also feel menacing as they crawl around, arachnid-like, picking off children. It helps that the movie shows restraint in its first half in neglecting to show them too much, instead relying on the boys speaking about them in awe and fear.

Overall, Maze Runner does allot of things well. I am not sure if they could have fit the whole self-contained story in one movie, but the ending leaves the whole movie down. Instead of feeling like a self-contained story with a satisfying conclusion, the movie instead feels like sequel bait with too many unresolved plot-points to make the journey worthwhile.

2 out of 5 lost-in-space Waffles.

BOARD GAME REVIEW: ZOMBIE 15"

Zombie 15" is a really good Zombie game. My view of it might just be colored by the fact that this is the first time-based game I have played, I am a sucker for a well-themed game or I really like co-operative games, but Zombie 15" has been the stand-out game that I have played in 2014. And there were allot of new games that I have played over 2014.

Zombie 15" is a co-operative game for 2-4 players. It is played on a modular board, with tiles set-up that can be changed to create different scenarios. Each player takes the role of a teenager with some different powers as they try to survive and outrun the main zombie horde. In each game, you have a goal to achieve in 15", often involving cutting a path through some zombies to a finishing tile.

The main strength of this game is right there in the title. Zombie 15" is played over 15 minutes. At certain times (depending on the scenario, every minute or 40 seconds), more zombies appear on whoever's turn it is. There are no traditional turn limits- just however many action you can fit into 15". This encourages the game to keep moving fast and analysis-paralysis is severely punished. It also means that no games ever drag, as you know that each game will last 15 minutes. The set-up time is also only approximately 10-15 minutes.

The artwork and plastic figures for the game are great and really match the exciting, upbeat tone of the game. They are colourful and never take themselves too seriously. The only complaint is some of the Zombie figures seem quite flimsy, but this is a minor complaint. The board, character cards and item cards all look fantastic and are of god quality.

One thing the game could improve upon is the co-operative aspects of the game. Most the scenarios just degenerate into each player leap-frogging the previous player and trying to kill zombies to clear a path. However, with a modular board and custom scenarios, I anticipate that the replay value of this game will go up. I have already been thinking of rules to put the Left 4 Dead Zombies in the game (especially the Witch and Tank) or to modify some of the tower defence-based scenarios, and the game encourages you to make up your own custom scenarios. There is a website where they will post them, although how flexible the core game is to allow custom scenarios remains to be seen.

Overall, Zombie 15" is my stand-out board game of 2014. Although I have played more serious games and games that ran longer, Zombie 15" has a strong, colourful theme to make it stand-out and is always allot of fun whenever we break it out for a game or 4.

4 out of 5 hordes of waffles.